Replace Google Goulash: Gourmet Muffin Lovin’ Writing Mastery

Kathy G Lynch
5 min readOct 9, 2021

Serving more than google goulash

Photo by NordWood Themes on Unsplash

Imagine you are a baker. And you’re having trouble with your oven. It’s a special oven, made especially for turning out scrumptious muffins by the dozens for your muffin lovin’ tribe. And your oven repairman is out of the country.

So, you’re muffin dough is going to waste. You’re frantic to save your forget-it-not muffins. You don’t want to have to settle for Google Goulash.

But your livelihood is at stake. Your business depends on you getting those muffins baked. And your customers are calling, wondering “Where’s my muffins?” So, your delivery men are sitting on their thumbs, waiting, and getting paid — but have no muffins to deliver.

Master Mr. Fix-It

Thus, you’re losing business. And losing more money faster than a loser at the racetrack. You wish desperately that this day would turn out to be a funny tale to remember instead of a disaster.

So, you desperately scour the area to find someone who can fix your oven. And you finally find someone.

The ‘fix-it’ guy quickly shows up, takes one look at your oven … and presses a button. And WHAMMO! just like that, your oven immediately fires up.

Then the fix-it guy hands you a bill. You look at it and gasp. The bill says, Service charge — $10,000.

Dazed, you say, “$10,000 just to push a button? I could have hired just anyone to do that!”

The fix-it guy scratches his head, looks around him at the waiting delivery men, and says, “But does ‘just anyone’ know which button to push?”

The Answer to Any problem

And the truth is, when it comes to any PROBLEM Pushing the Right On/OFF Button is the Lesson Experts Manifest. It’s the learning experience of the masters. It’s the lucrative recipe of Monetization.

And as far as recipes go, there’s even the oldest secret family recipe for success … Even for writing.

Especially if muffins are your specialty. Especially when it comes to the MUFFIN in writing where you are Making Under-reported Facts Fascinations Immediately Noticed.

Because when it comes to muffin writing, or any kind of writing (or any kind of business at all), you have to know what you’re doing. You have to know how your words are affecting your readers, as well as anyone involved in your business.

And a writer definitely has to know how her readers will respond to what she says.

And you, especially as a writer, have to know exactly how to say what you want to say in the way that will cause readers to think “Yeah, I get that”… and then they immediately jump on what you say, and take the action you want them to take.

Becoming A Muffin Lovin’ Writing Master

When you know how to do that, you have become a muffin lovin’ writing master. You have become that master of your craft whose muffins are gobbled up faster than you can bake them. And you have become a true artist who whips up something that’s awe-inspiring for just the right audience/customer.

Becoming a master baker, a master muffin maker, or a master writer, means you must specialize in the type of writing (or muffins) that pleases your customers. You must learn all you need to know to determine if your customers love the old-fashioned English muffins using yeast. Or if they prefer the American style muffins using baking powder.

When you learn all about what your customers desire in a muffin, then you can conjure up just the right muffin to make just the right impact on just the right customer. Just like all masters do. For you have become like a word magician who can conjure up spells of impact and persuasion that move your audience to do what you suggest.

Serving Gourmet Treats Instead of Google Goulash

Simply because they believe in what you say. Simply because you have turned on the switch of their belief. Just like the fix-it guy turned on the switch to that muffin-making oven.

Until you can do that you are just putting out what master copywriter Bob Bly calls “Google goulash”. Junk food that people everywhere are gobbling up. Empty calories that people imbibe just to satisfy a craving they have yet to really get satisfied.

So, today I’m offering you this nutritious gourmet treat. A muffin lovin’ writing recipe to not only whet your appetite. But satiate it.

Becoming Master of the Muffin

I am offering you the chance to become a master of the MUFFIN, a master undaunted by fears of failure who invests in the necessities of the niceties. A muffin master who knows it’s only natural to ask yourself: “Am I mastering the urgency of fulfilling my fans’ immediate needs?”

A master who asks, “Am I making my uniqueness a festival of fulfillment that’s irresistible to my network of neighborhood natives?” And who also asks, “Am I moving unwaveringly forwards with followers by offering inviting nibbles of novelty?”

Bly says, “if you can produce info products with actionable how-to instructions — experience-based methods and strategies proven to work and get results — people will willingly pay for it.”

They will, in fact, pay big bucks for it. And that’s an important goal for any writer to master. Especially a muffin lovin’ writer who’s trying to support her habits of the niceties by learning her craft.

So, lets all stop settling for empty calories, junk food, and Google goulash. Let us please maintain a diet of nutritious treats as we become masters of the muffin. For we can each partake of some of the lessons of the masters.

Masters Don’t Settle for Google Goulash

For, yes, even the masters must have had goulash for supper sometimes. But they didn’t settle for a steady diet of goulash.

Instead, they practiced their craft every day and learned which buttons to push to keep their ovens heated. And they gained new experiences by trying out different methods, as well as different muffin recipes.

So, they eventually earned a lifetime of suppers worthy of their exquisite tastes.

And every writer must ask themselves one more important question: Am I ready to become a muffin lovin’ writing master instead of settling for google goulash?

If your answer is yes, Join me on my journey of becoming a muffin lovin’ master writer by emailing me at kathyglynch@hotmail.com. Send me your email address with the words Crock Pot and I’ll send you my FREE pdf A Crock Pot Full of Writing Recipes for Money Making Mastery

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Kathy G Lynch

Kathy G. wants to show farmer's daughters how to become successful writers even in this highly competive world